This is why it’s important that your bull also emotionally supersedes you as well. You can still have a loving relationship but make sure the bull’s needs come first. Validate your bull. It can be via love or it can simply be the communication from your partner that the bull matters more than you in every way.
That night she used me for her pleasure in a way
she never had before. Gone was the tentative power-play where she catered to my
kinky desires. Tonight was about her. She was in charge.
“Doggies don’t need clothes.” She announced as
soon as we were in the door, and roughly removed mine. There was no seduction
in this act. It was quick and perfunctory. When she was done she threw them in
the trash. Um, was I getting those back after this?
“You look naked without a collar. What a perv.
I’ll need to get you one, you naughty little bitch.”
That word…
“Sit.” She commanded. I kneeled, sitting on my
heels.
“Arf arf,” I interjected, raising my hands into
begging dog position.
“Shut up, bitch! You’re not being rewarded.
You’ve been bad, remember?”
“Sorry Master,” I said, looking down in penance.
“Doggies don’t talk, they obey!” she spat,
suddenly slapping me across the right cheek.
Slap!
I was shocked. It stung. A lot.
“You surprised, little doggie? Good. Don’t get
used to it. I like hurting you. But I want to see that confused look of pain
and betrayal on your face. Never lose that.”
Holy fuck! Were we lying all the card on the
table? I didn’t have any idea.
Just then she lifted the hem of her short, black
velvet dress, exposing herself. She was definitely not wearing underwear. She
never went out bare. He must have taken her underwear after all. Plus
she was totally shaved. She hated that. Said it felt demeaning,
patriarchal. Made her look like a porn star. He must have told her to do
it. Or else she voluntarily wanted to present herself to him like
that. I didn’t know which was more humiliating.
Kindra placed a hand on the back of my head,
grasping the hair painfully, and slowly pushed my face against her vulva. She
moved her hips back and forth, smearing secretions from her very wet labia
against my cheeks, nose, eyes. It was more purposeful than sexy. And it
couldn’t have been stimulating her clit. She was making a statement. She was
marking me.
“You’ve been a bad doggie. I’m rubbing your nose
in it. Let the shame sink in. Take a deep sniff. That’s the smell of your
Master. Recognize and obey.”
She yanked my head back.
“Look at you. So pathetic. Covered in my juices.
As happy as could be. You’re a little bitch. You know that, right?”
I nodded affirmatively.
“You like being a beta male?”
That phrase… I
nodded again, reluctantly, ashamed.
“Good. Now follow me.”
She pulled out a kitchen chair and sat down,
lifting her skirt up again.
“Now I know you doggies like to lick your Master
to get their scent. So lick away. And don’t stop until I say so.”
I walked over on all fours and began carefully
licking her labia. Kindra let key skirt fall over my head. I was in the dark.
She couldn’t see me. I was merely servicing her. Fulfilling my function.
She began directing me. Lick here, now there,
deeper, harder, faster, gentler, in a circular motion. She had never given
me such guidance before. She had been awkward about it. Silent. Now she
wouldn’t stop talking. Calling me a beta bitch, a good doggie. Pathetic.
It was humiliating but I was so turned on. When I started touching myself,
though, she smacked me in the head, hard.
“You will follow orders and nothing more! Your
pleasure is not your concern. It is mine. I will let you know when I think you
should have any. If it were up to me you wouldn’t enjoy this at all. But I know
I can’t count on that, you little pervert.”
Her first orgasm had come fast. But she kept me
going. Now she wanted me to go slowly. My jaw felt sore as the minutes passed.
Kindra snapped my head back as her second orgasm
came and she slapped me fiercely across the face, moaning loudly. My ears rung. What had the been for? Then Kindra walked over to the bed and flopped
down. Her legs over the edge.
“Much better. I was getting tired. Crawl over
here, puppy, and keep up your task.”
I complied.
She came three to five more times – I lost count
– before releasing me.
“Wow! That felt good. Curl up there at the side
of the bed. Let’s take a nap. You deserve it, you good little doggie.”
Kindra laid down fully on the bed and fell
asleep almost immediately. I was exhausted, emotionally and physically. I was
also incredible horny. I considered taking the couch. I considered going to the
bathroom and masturbating. Yet I couldn’t bring myself to disobey her. So I
curled up in a fetal position right there and tried to sleep.
I didn’t think I would find any rest. Frantic
thoughts kep running through my head. What did she know? What had I
become? Did this mean I had lost her or that I hadn’t? What did she know
that I knew? Was that sex? It was more sex than we’d had in a while. Since he
had entered the picture. Perhaps it was better than nothing. Perhaps it was
better than everything?
————————————————————-
I awoke to a kiss being planted on my cheek.
“Hey sweety. I love you! That’s so cute that you
actually napped right there. You’re so dedicated. God! It was so fucking
hot!…Right?”
“It was amazing,” I said wistfully.
Slap!
“Doggies don’t talk!”
I looked down in shame and confusion.
“Aww, just kidding! Sorry. I couldn’t resist.” She
giggled then pulled my face up to hers and kissed it gently, lovingly. “Forgive
me?”
“Of course, my lo-”
Slap!
“Stupid bitch! Don’t fucking talk and
don’t fucking call me yours. You’re mine, not the other way around.
Understand?”
I stared at her with fear and devotion in my
eyes and nodded. She smiled wickedly.
She giggled.
“Aww, no, I’m really sorry. I’m so naughty.
Sorry, I guess I was just still caught up in the moment. Forgive me?”
I just nodded.
“Fuck! I’m so bad. I love that look of terror
and confusion on your face. Does that make me evil?”
I shook my head vigorously.
“But what if I want to be evil? How would I do
that?” she asked, running her fingers through my hair, mischief in her voice
and a smirk on her face.
I stared, uncertain.
“Sit here on the bed with me, honey,” she said,
patting the spot next to her.
I complied.
“I really am sorry. You don’t hate me, do you?”
I shook my head.
“No no, you really can speak! I promise.”
She hugged me to her. The velvet of her dress
felt scintillating against my cold, naked skin. Kindra’s left hand began
caressing my thigh.
“I love you,” she breathed in my ear.
Her hand moved to my genitals. My penis began to
harden, tentatively. She gave it a few strokes until it was fully erect. Then
the hand began gently caressing my still sore testicles. It felt amazing.
“Tell me how it was for you,” she whispered.
“…It was like…metamorphosis. I felt like an
entirely different person. Like not even a person. I was fulfilled in my
service to you.”
“Go on,” Kindra purred into my ear, bringing her
other hand around my body to grasp my shaft and slowly tease it. “Tell me, were
you frustrated by not getting release?”
“Yes, it was agony.”
She pumped faster.
“Do you want release now?”
She began squeezing my balls in pulses while
stroking my cock.
“Fuck! God. Yes.”
She clamped down on my testicles and squeezed
with all her might.
“Ahhh! Ow ow ow. Ease up, ease up.”
She didn’t ease up. On the contrary, she kept
her grasp firm, repositioned to face me, and used her free hand to slap me.
Slap!
“How fucking stupid are you, you beta bitch?!
Like seriously how many times can I fool you before you get it? I don’t give a
shit how you felt. I don’t care about your ‘metamorphosis’ or any other idiotic
garbage your brain generates to justify this to itself. You aren’t a person to
me, you are a loyal dog that lets me beat it. Comprehend?”
I nodded, tears welling up in my eyes.
She began laughing. Joyously. Smile wide. She
moved her face towards mine and I flinched. This caused her to laugh even
harder. She pressed her lips to corner of my eye and sucked in the tear that
had formed.
Which just caused me to whimper and start crying
in earnest.
“Ohh, shh shh, it’s okay,” Kindra cooed. She
began licking my face as the tears came. “I love these tears. They let me know
I’m evil. I am evil, right?”
I nodded, trying to blink my vision back into
focus.
“Good, good,” she breathed into my ear, “that’s
all I wanted to hear.”
She began caressing my hair with one hand. Her
other was squeezing my balls. Sometimes painfully, sometimes gently.
“All these times we played these games, it was
all about you and your sick desires, you know?”
I nodded.
“I was never really in charge. I was your
servant. But somehow imagining you as a doggie let me finally take the reins,
you know?”
I nodded. She squeezed hard on my poor
testicles.
“It felt so good. I was so confident. I finally
knew what it meant to focus on myself and my pleasure. To the exclusion of
yours. To the nullification of your pleasure. Of your personhood… Well, the
nullification of your agency, at least..”
Here she began stroking my cock again, which had
gone soft in all the confusion and pain.
“Because it meant so much to me that I was above
you as a person. You weren’t just a sex toy, some object, you know? You
were my pet. My degraded boyfriend. You had lost so much to me. Willingly gave
it. God! This is getting me hot!” She stroked me faster. “I guess it’s
good for you, too.”
Without warning Kindra swung her leg over my lap
and straddled me, guiding my now erect penis inside of her. It felt hot in
there and incredibly slick. We usually needed lube. Not today. We always
used condoms. Not today.
Kindra lifted and lowered herself in slow,
gentle rhythms. She held my face with both hands, tilting it up so I had to
meet her gaze. Tears were still occasionally falling down my cheeks as she
slowly fucked me.
“Shh, shh, don’t cry anymore, little doggie,”
she said, wiping away my tears. “This feels nice, right?”
I nodded.
Slap!
“Shh, shh, it’s okay. You know I don’t care
about your pleasure, though. It doesn’t matter anymore. Your pain turns me on,
now.”
I whimpered.
“God! That sound thrills me, too!” She began
grinding into me harder, faster. My pelvis bone started to hurt. She pulled my
face, – hot and slick with tears – into her cleavage.
“Maybe I’ll let you come in me.”
I tried to pull away, to shake my head, but she
held me firm. There wasn’t a condom! Had she forgotten?
“Shh, shh, you can’t get away. You’re mine. I’ll
make you impregnate me…That’s your biggest fear, right? Yeah. Maybe I stopped
taking my birth control weeks ago…would you have noticed?” Her quick, steady
rhythm continued. I was terrified. Was it true? I tried to pull away.
She just wrapped her legs under mine and held me tighter. She was so strong.
“Shh, shh, that’s right. Maybe you should have
let me teach you judo? Now I’m going to make you knock me up and you can’t stop
me.”
I didn’t want this…Or I wanted it more than
anything? I was hers. I wanted to serve her in any way she demanded. But that
was just the hormones talking. This would definitely feel like a huge mistake
after I came down. Yet I still wanted it.
She tried to finish me off with hard, deep
thrusts.
“Come now. Come for me baby. Give me what I
want. Knock me up. Lose yourself. Lose. Lose. Lose, my little pathetic bitch.”
At the word bitch I couldn’t hold it in.
I cried out, shooting torrents deep into her. I released an agonized moan. At
that, she ground into my pelvis even harder and started shaking and
shouting. The fingers of one hand dug into my back painfully while the other
pulled my hair mercilessly.
“Yes, yes, yes! I own you! Ahhh! Fuck! You’re so
pathetic. You bitch, ahh!, pathetic beta, ahh!, my bitch. Ohhh…”
With that she slumped into me and took deep,
slow breaths. Minutes passed.
“Ahhh, wow, okay. Woo. Doggie mode over. Thank
you sweety.”
Kindra lifted herself off my lap and gently
pushed me over onto the bed. She leaned down and kissed me sweetly before
sitting back up, straddling my torso.
“I am on birth control, of course.” Then
Kindra reached a hand down, inserted a finger into her vagina and pulled it
back out in a hook shape. A sizable glob of warm, white goo plopped down onto
my stomach.
“But you can never be too careful.” She wiped
her finger through the mess. There was some red blood mixed in. She looked at
it admiringly. “My period always makes me so horny. Care for a taste?” She
extended her messy finger to my moth.
A taste was the last thing I wanted. I was
coming down from sex madness and the idea of putting that in my mouth disgusted
me. But I was also afraid. Kindra had said the role-play was over, again,
but I couldn’t trust Kindra anymore. And I didn’t have the endorphins to
protect me if she hit me. I had to do as she asked. I opened my mouth
compliantly. She put her finger right in and I wrapped my lips around it and
sucked it clean.
“Hehe, that tickles. Hey! You’ll never eat your
cum. I like this….Wait, you’re not still afraid of me, are you?”
I shook my head. It probably wasn’t convincing.
“No…no. I’m… gosh, I can’t say I’m sorry
anymore and be believed, can I? I don’t know what took hold of me. I
thought…you wanted this? But no, was it all just for me? I’m not really evil.
Am I?”
I shook my head.
“Shit!…” Then she started crying, just
a little, quietly, shoulders shaking, face in her hands. “I…fucked everything
up didn’t I? I traumatized you. I’m such a fucking idiot! I destroyed your
trust in me. Which was hot in the moment, but…fuck! I never should have let
myself go like that. I was too unrestrained. Too free. I even used your biggest
fear against you. What the hell is wrong with me!? Am I a monster?”
She was sobbing harder now. This sounded real. I
put an arm around her.
“Look, Kindra…” No slap? “…Kindra, it’s
fine. It was, um, intense, but it’ll be okay. It was a lot of fun.”
“Yeah?”
“I mean it.”
Kindra sniffled a few times and wiped her face
in her palms. She looked up at me.
“You’re too good for me.”
“No, my Master is the best.”
She laughed. “Don’t even joke about that right
now. But it was good?”
“So good.” I kissed her cheek.
Her cheek was…totally dry? I pulled back and
looked at her face. Her eyes weren’t red or shiny, her face wasn’t flush. Had
this all been a ruse?
“I love you honey. Sorry I turned evil.” She
laughed.
“It’s…okay. I love you.”
“I love you too, darling boy.”
Just then Kindra got a text. She grabbed up her
phone from the side table and turned toward me so I couldn’t read the screen.
Her face lit up with a big grin while she texted back and forth. After a
while she spoke to me.
“Okay. well, I‘m gonna go to the bar and meet up
with Yaz.”
“At Ariadne? It’s…eleven on a weekday night.”
Ariadne was more of a club than a bar. A bit seedy. Untoward things were said
to happen in the alley behind it.
“And you go to bars at 9PM? No one would be
there, silly.”
“Right…”
“Besides, we have a lot to talk about. She’s so
excited to hear about my new beta bitch.”
“Haha, oh, you’re going to tell her about that?”
“Well…sorry, I guess that is weird?… But I
already told her and I kinda tell her everything? You know? Besides I really
need to process. I still feel weird about it.”
“Of course; go have fun.”
“Thanks! You’re such a good boy. I may crash at
her place if I get too drunk.”
“Oh…okay.”
Yaz lived a mile from Ariadne in the opposite
direction. Kindra and I were only a mile and a half away to the east of the
bar. She had always walked back before. And she never got very drunk. Besides,
she was a martial arts badass. She could protect herself from creeps. What
did it mean? It had to be him, right?
Kindra went to use the bathroom. I quickly
grabbed her phone and unlocked it. Huh. It really was Yaz.
You: I
have so much to tell you! You’ll be so proud of me!
Yaz: Did you fuck the high schooler?
You: More
like he fucked my face in the bathroom of the restaurant!
Yaz: Damn, what a slut you’ve become
You: Not
long ago I would have slapped you for that, but I’ve embraced it. I love it 🙂
Yaz: You wanton whore, you
You: You
don’t even know. I’m his “bitch” 🙂
Yaz: That’s not a word I expected to see from
you
You: It
gets me hot when he says it. I feel demeaned and owned, but I like it. I’m a
bad feminist now ;P
Yaz: Nothing hotter than being bad
You: Then
he fingered me under the table right in front of the BF!
Yaz: No!
You: Yes!
Yaz: You fucking bitch. How did you get away
with that?
You: I’m
a slut ninja, baby. But that’s not even the half of it.
Yaz: Don’t keep a girl waiting.
You: Come
out to the bar?
Yaz: It’s a weekday.
You: Dax
will be there
Yaz: Your teen lover will be at a bar?
You: Gerry
at the door wants me bad. He’ll do anything I say if I sit in his lap for a
minute
Yaz: Isn’t it against your silly “code” to use
sex appeal for platonic favors?
You: I
told you. I’ve loosened up since an Alpha claimed me. I’m breaking all my own
rules.
Yaz: From prude to vixen. I guess I could make
it out for an unruly sex fiend
You: You
can be lookout for us when we go out back…
Yaz: Damn, you know what to say to a girl. But
if you start fucking in that alley I’m not gonna be able to look away.
You: 😛
see you soon!
Fuck! I hit back to see if
Dax had said anything.
Dax: Why’d you run off?
You: Don’t
be mad
Dax: Should I be?
You: No,
be proud.
Dax: ?
You: I
made him my bitch!
Dax: Made nothing, he was born a bitch
You: Fine.
But now he knows it.
You: Did
you see that tip?
Dax: More like bribe. I thought he was trying to
buy you back
You: I
made him empty his wallet 🙂
Dax: Humiliation. Nice. You’re learning.
You: He
did everything I commanded. It felt amazing
Dax: It’s in his nature.
You: I
totally wrecked him. I ruined his sense of safety around me. Shit, it’s getting
me hot just thinking about it.
Dax: Good job, bitch. Who’s my good girl?
You: purrr
Dax: *slaps that ass*
Dax: I want to wreck you, girl.
You: Come
out? Ariadne?
Dax: See you soon, my bitch.
Dax: Your boyfriend’s buying
I heard Kindra opening the door and I scrambled
to hit power and place the phone on the bed. I didn’t have time to switch text
conversations. Shit!
Kindra grabbed up her matching black purse and
threw her phone in. She leaned down and kissed me sweetly before-
Slap!
“See ya later, beta bitch.” Giggling and blowing
a kiss, she left.
Natural selection. Good on you for being the leader they both need
The leader I need, not the leader I deserve. The bruises I want. Probably the bruises I deserve, too…
Waiter, part 4
It had been about five minutes and she hadn’t
come back. I had stopped reading her texts a while ago. I hadn’t seen them all,
but it was too demoralizing to continue.
Where was she? Stupid question. I knew. With him.
Were they actually just fucking in the bathroom? Would that be their first
time? I didn’t know anymore if the idea repulsed me or turned me on.
I started browsing my phone. Beta male.
There it was in my Google search, though I didn’t recall choosing to type it.
Some stuff came up about wolves. Followed by bullshit pickup artist schlock.
Then MRA babies. Finally Urban Dictionary.
“The opposite of Alpha Male. In modern society
an Alpha Male not only requires physical prowess but also confidence and attitude…The
beta male tends to be smart, quiet, and non-confrontational.”
Well there was certainly something to that
between he and I. I was so non-confrontational I let him do all this.
“If lucky, beta males can get a hot chick once
in her 30’s, after she’s tired of fucking Alpha Males, and decides to settle
down with a beta male for money stability. Alpha Males get everything, beta
males get the leftovers. It’s a little thing called ‘Life’…”
Childish, and yet, I kept reading. It was like I
was flogging myself with these definitions. Burning myself with shame. There
were several in defense of the intelligence and sensitivity of the beta male. I
only skimmed those. I was aiming for condemnation.
“To be a bitch like male.”
Bitch. So that’s what we both
were now? His bitches? The notion thrilled me as much as it disgusted.
What is the role of a beta male?
Some advice column came up, answering a question
from a woman dating a beta.
“Alpha males are the ones who will always follow
up quickly, make the first move, and claim you as their girlfriends. Beta males
are the ones who have more kindness than confidence. They’re not nearly as
assertive. They’re so passive as to be, well, almost feminine in nature…when
you’re with a beta male you’re ALLOWED to be more Alpha…if he’s a true beta
male he’ll be THRILLED that you’re taking control.”
That certainly described Kindra and I. She was
very much in control. I appreciated it. Had she been yearning for a take charge
male this whole time? We’d spent months moving from friends to romantic
partners. She seemed to liked my care and thoughtfulness. Yet this guy had
swept in right under my nose, hit on Kindra, gotten her number, and claimed her
as his “bitch”. In mere days.
She seemed to like that, too. Enough to stop
fucking me. Enough to let him use sexist slurs for her and take possession of
her. She wanted to be dominated.
Still no sign of her.
What does tumblr say? Alpha bull, eh?…
”A beta male’s penis is like the wings on a
penguin. It does not serve any meaningful function….but just as flightless
birds serve a purpose in the world, so does the beta male. He just needs to
learn his purpose early on or else he will be frustrated later. Just like a
penguin who has been told it can fly.”
My purpose? What would that be? To sit aside and
watch him take my girlfriend? To drink his urine?
“I advise college-aged girls who are interested
in cuckolding to have a an ‘emotional boyfriend’ and a ‘physical
boyfriend’ …explain she has an emotional attachment to the beta male,
depends on his support, but that she is still young and wants to explore
physically…the young beta male who takes readily to the idea of being her
emotional-only boyfriend will quickly develop into a supportive cuckold, as the
men she choose as sexual boyfriends, given their age, are full of masculine
energy and aggression. This reinforces the beta male’s role constantly.”
Cuckold? I knew that from Shakespeare but not as
a form of relationship. Were Kindra and he growing my cuckold horns even as I
read up on my new role? I had sort of been thinking she was going to throw me
aside soon. Yet she had kissed me so warmly just now. Even while dressed up for him. Even while coming here just to see him. Even just before
going off to fuck him. Was I, her emotional-only boyfriend, a cuckold
now?
She still wasn’t back.
Next was a series of tips on showing deference
to other males, in front of your partner.
“She will recognize that you, the beta male, are
voluntarily establishing yourself on a lower position on the hierarchy than
other men. This will simultaneously attract her to those men, and repel her
sexually from you.”
Hmm.
“Hey sweety! No, I didn’t fall in. Sorry for the
delay.” Kindra came up and kissed me. Deeply. Did her mouth…taste like semen?
As our tongues intertwined I knew. Pulling back, I took appraisal of
her. Rather than having straightened up, she was disheveled. Hair messy, a
strap of her dress nearly falling off her shoulder, makeup smudged.
And of course he was coming right behind
her, with menus. Out of his pocket, I could swear I saw a pair of black lace
panties poking out. Kindra definitely had some like that.
I hopped right up.
“Thank you, Sir!” I exclaimed, taking the menus
and extending my right hand. He looked at me quizzically, as if evaluating an
unexpected threat. But he returned my handshake. Very firmly. Ow! I
smiled and rubbed my hand. “That’s quite a strong grip you have,” I said.
“Thanks. I work out.”
“I can tell,” I said admiringly. “So, Kindra
tells me you’ve been very nice to her when we’ve been here. She was hoping you
could be friends. So…could you sit down for a minute? Or…would that break
protocol?”
I gestured to the side of the booth I had been
occupying. Points one and two in “How to Show Deference”. Call the Alpha Male “Sir”
and offer him your seat. Why the hell was I doing this? Kindra and he
both looked confused. And nervous. But he recovered his composure
quickly.
“I have a minute,” he replied, taking a seat
next to Kindra instead of the one I offered. He sat very close.
I
think I heard her gasp while he settled in. She tried to hide it as a hiccup. What
had he done?
“Kindra said your name is Dax?”
“‘I liked ‘Sir’,” he said, glaring at me with a
wolf’s grin, predatory yet wary.
“Haha, you got it, Sir. Thanks for
sitting down with us. It’s a weird request, I know.”
“Yes, we shouldn’t keep him,” Kindra said,
giving me a confused, pleading look. But just then she let out another stifled
gasp. Her face reddened and she struggled for composure.
“The pleasure is all mine, I assure you,” he
interjected smugly. His right hand was under the table. No doubt if I peaked
I’d see it between Kindra’s legs.
“Oh! Let me get you some water! It will be a
treat, you being served for once. I know where the pitchers are.” I walked over
to a nearby side table and grabbed a full water pitcher and a glass. Walking
back over, I positioned myself so I couldn’t see what was happening under their
side of the table and poured him a glass. I returned the pitcher before sitting
back down. Point 3: offer him a drink.
Kindra was struggling to keep her face straight.
I pretended not to notice. We chatted about mundane things for a while. I kept
trying to be subtly deferential to him. Praising him, acting like I was trying
to impress.
Or was I acting? The weird thing was, what started as a mad thought had quickly
become compulsion and then nature. I wasn’t acting anymore. I really did
want to impress him. I wanted him to praise me like a puppy. Like a bitch.
That’s when I noticed a foot in my crotch.
Kindra? No, it it was a boot, not her dress shoes. The toe pressed firmly and
relentless in. He was crushing my balls. It was my turn to struggle to keep a
straight face. It was anguish.
“Kindra, tell me more about your field of
study,” he asked nonchalantly, “What was your thesis?”
“Umm, ahhh, well.” Her face was flush. She was
having a hard time getting words out. “It’s ahh, kind of boring…for
dinner, ummm,” she placed her palms on the table top and took a deep breath,
“talk.”
“Come now,” he insisted, a curious
intensity to his words, ”I’m interested. Come. Now.”
Kindra was staring down at the table now,
fingers splayed, taking deep breaths. At the same time, he began
pressing harder into my balls. I thought they might break, turn to paste. Was I
dying? I was going to pass out. Or cry. Kindra started sputtering. Moaning?
“I, ahhhhh, ohhhhh.” Her breathing was fast now,
shallow. She opened her mouth again as if to speak but instead her lips formed
into a silent O before she clamped them back together. Her eyes closed tightly
and she shook her head no. Her face flushed further and her torso convulsed.
Several times, in pulses.
I knew exactly what had happened. An innocent
onlooker might have missed it. Mistaken it all for extreme shyness. Maybe a
panic attack? Would an innocent version of me have known? Kindra was shy at
times, could be awkward. But I knew. The mind-numbing pain in my crotch
was melding with arousal. Fuck. I was a beta male that knew his girlfriend
had just been brought to orgasm in front of him, in public, by an Alpha who was
simultaneously destroying my manhood. Fuck. It felt amazing.
In a moment Kindra’s breathing returned to slow,
deep breaths, but she didn’t look up.
“Well, I won’t pry. Another time. But I should
get going. Thank you for your hospitality.” With that he removed his
foot from my crotch and took Kindra’s hand, kissing it cordially when she
looked up to meet his gaze.
—————————————————–
We both sat there in silence, breathing and
trying to regain our calm. Finally I spoke up.
“That was nice.”
“Yes,” she said flatly, not looking into my
eyes.
“Sorry to spring that on you.”
“It was fine.”
“He does seem nice.”
“Yeah.”
“You acted…uncomfortable when he asked you
about your thesis…”
She looked into my eyes then, appraisingly. Was
she wondering what I knew? Could I possibly have missed that? She had been
discreet, right? Considering? I kept my face neutral.
“Just suddenly felt shy. And boring.”
“Aww, but you’re not boring. You’re amazing”
“Thanks,” she said, and smiled with real warmth.
“And see? I can be friendly. I can make
friends.”
“Haha. Yes, good boy.” She intoned
jokingly.
“Arf arf.”
“Very good boy.” She scratched me under the
chin. “But I thought you were a jealous doggie about that particular pitbull?”
“Well, you know, a golden retriever just can’t
help being friendly to a fault.”
“You’d be a terrible guard dog.”
“But great at licking hands. And feet.”
“Yes… I suppose I never need doubt your
affections.”
“Loyal to a fault, too.”
She was silent for a moment.
“What if I kick you?” she asked, in a seeking
tone.
“I’d be confused. I’d give you those
guilt-inducing puppy dog eyes,” I replied airily. “But I’d forgive.”
She paused again.
“What if I didn’t feel guilty, though? What if I
liked kicking you?” she asked seriously.
I gazed back at her and considered.
“Maybe I like being kicked?” I responded
earnestly.
“You’re too good for me.”
She reached up and held my chin.
“No, my Master is the best.”
She let her hand slide downward, caressing my
neck and then wrapping her fingers around, grasping it. Just like he had.
But lightly. Not painfully. With a confident air of ownership.
“I need to get you home and show you your
place.”
“We haven’t even ordered.”
“Who’s the Master, doggie?!”
I whimpered and inclined my head toward Kindra.
“That’s right. Now you’ve been bad. I need to
take you home immediately and rub your face in it. But first leave a tip for
the nice pitbull you befriended. A good one.”
I pulled out a five and dropped it on the table.
“Better than that.”
I pulled out a twenty and dropped it on top.
“Paltry. Show him he’s the Alpha.”
With a whimper, I emptied my wallet: two more
twenties and three ones.
“Adequate. Carry more cash in the future.”
As far lost in the role-play as I was, still a
ping of fear struck me. Sixty eight dollars was a lot of money for me. But I
bit my tongue.
“Yes, Ma’am.”
“Master.”
“Sorry, Master.”
Kindra grabbed my hand and dragged me out of
there. As we passed the register Dax gave us a bewildered look.
“Leaving so soon? I hope it wasn’t something I
said.”
“No, Dax, you were, um…very good,” Kindra
said. “But this one’s been bad. Apologize.” She directed the last to me. I was
a little taken aback but complied.
“I’m terribly sorry, Sir,” I mumbled sheepishly.
“Good boy. See you later, Dax.” Her tone
was mildly flirtatious and she winked at him. Was I supposed to see
that?
Is she lactating on one side?
Waiter, part 3
“I think I
should freshen up, too, actually”
Kindra’s voice pulled me out of my
reverie. I am a…beta? What did that even mean? It felt true. But I was
just horny. Probably. He was merely some overconfident high school kid.
Even if Kindra fooled around with him, so what? It didn’t mean anything about
me. Or about her. She was too strong to be claimed by him. Like I had been… What the hell was I thinking?!
Just then I looked over and saw
Kindra, across the restaurant, suddenly pulled aside by him.
He led her into the back hallway where the bathroom were, out of sight. Ugh.
That fucking kid. I should never have stooped to his level. That damned bet. It
started all this. Never take the bait, you
fool! There’s no way to win doing
exactly what some jerk says. What
he said. Oh shit, there was
Kindra’s phone. He said to check the texts. Fuck!
I picked it up and quickly put in the code I knew by heart, having seen it
entered so many times.
Texts, texts, texts. Gah.
His were right there when I opened the app. No precautions taken. I needed to
be quick. I scrolled back to the top.
Dax: Thanks for your number,
beautiful 😉
You: Same
to you, cutie
Dax: Those
were some quick moves in front of your BF
You: You
did kinda force my hand
You: I
said no, you know 😉
Dax: I
don’t take no for an answer
You: That’s
not cool…
Dax: A
little boldness and perseverance can make all the difference
Dax: Do you
regret it?
You: No
You: It
was my decision. I wanted this.
Dax: You
needed this
Dax: I’ll
show you what a bold man can do
You: You
better be discreet!
Dax:Says
the girl texting a guy in front from her BF
You: Promise!
Dax:
Anything for you, sexy
You: gtg!
So that’s
where it began. I skimmed some more texts. There was a lot of flirting.
Apparently they did manage to meet up IRL. Briefly, as far as I could tell.
During a break at her work. He played hookey from school and surprised her. He
snuck a kiss. But they were seen?! She had to swear her close friend/coworker Yaz to
secrecy. Sounded like she thought it was a fun secret to keep. And I liked Yaz!
Then something caught my eye. The
word bitch?! He said that to her?
Dax: Hey
bitch
You: WTF?!
Dax: You’re
my bitch
You: Never
call a woman that
You: It’s
not cool
Dax: Hey
I’m sorry
Dax: I
didn’t mean to offend
You: Well
you did
You: But
you didn’t know, so it’s forgiven
Dax: I just
meant that you’re my girl
Dax: My
woman
You: I
don’t belong to anyone
Dax: Come
on!
Dax: I’m
your man
You: One
of them 😛
Dax: He
isn’t a man
You: Is
that so?
Dax: Not if
you’re cheating on him
Dax: You
like me because I’m a man
You: You’re
a high school boy
You: I
have a Master’s in gender studies
You: You
have a lot to learn
Dax: Man enough
to pick you up in front of that boy of yours
Dax: Man
enough to rock your world
Dax: Man
enough to invalidate him by comparison
You: You
are a cave man, my man 🙂
Dax: You
like it.
You: Maybe…
Dax: My
woman
You: hmm
Dax: Just
admit it feels good
You: You
draw such unexpected things out of me…
Dax: I knew
it!
Dax: You’re
my bitch
You: Don’t
even
Dax: You’re
cheating on your BF
You: Barely
Dax: Please
Dax: You are
Dax: Have
you fucked him lately?
You: No
Dax:
Because of me.
You: None
of your business
Dax: It IS
because of me.
Dax: That
makes you a bitch
You: So
now you’re judging me for this?!
Dax: Just
telling you what you are
You: WTF!
Dax: No
shame. You’re my bitch now, so it’s okay.
Dax: You’re
a powerful bitch who chooses the men she wants and doesn’t care about societal
norms
You: Now
that I can get behind
Dax: That’s
right, bitch
Dax: You’re
a liberated woman but you’re also my bitch
Dax: I
claimed you
You: Yeah?
Dax: I
could tell you were too much woman for him. So I stole you away.
You: So
I’m a prize now?
Dax: Only
to the right man. One strong enough to handle you.
You: So
I need to be handled?
Dax: 😉 you
know it
What the
fuck?! That was unexpected. I couldn’t believe she let him say that to her.
Would my sassy, fiery Kindra really bow to regressive attitudes like that?
I gulped …I had.
Then there was some sexting. Late
at night. Just like I remembered.
Dax: You’re
lying right next to him?
You: Yes…
Dax: So
naughty
Dax: Touch
yourself, bitch
You: Yes
Dax: Good
girl.
You: But
I’m so bad…
Dax: You’re
being bad to him
Dax: But
it’s for me
Dax: Right?
You: Fuck
yes! It’s so hot
Dax: That’s
my good girl
You: I
wish you were fucking me right now
Dax: Next
to him?
You: Sleeping
through the whole thing
You: Never
knowing
Dax: You
calling out my name into the pillow
You: Yes!
Dax: Betray
your pathetic BF for me
You: Mmmm
Dax: Give
in to a real man
Dax: Devote
your body to me
You: You
own me
You: I
need you
Dax: Soon.
You: Not
soon enough
Dax: Come
for me, bitch
You: Yesss
My heart
was at the bottom of my stomach. I put the phone back. It was true. Things were
falling together exactly how he said they would. And I had to look the other way.
Be his accomplice. Besides, if I did speak up, would it matter? She was clearly
falling forhis “charms”. Would she stop even if she was
caught?
Seemed unlikely. …Would I want
her to stop? Of course!
No.
Maybe?
Ugh. Was I just a…beta male? Was this all happening because it was the
natural order? He was stepping into his rightful place as Alpha? Everything I
believed cried no. But deep down my feelings seemed to be whispering yes.
Waiter, part 2
Kindra and
I had a monogamous relationship. She had firmly established that point when we
got together. It wasn’t a moral thing; she just needed monogamy to feel
comfortable and secure, she’d said. I had assented easily. Monogamy was all I
knew.
Yet here
was my girlfriend covertly giggling and texting some buff waiter from our
favorite restaurant.
Not some waiter. “His name’s Dax,” Kindra had scolded me the other day, before all
this started.
Though now
it was, “oh it’s just Yaz, she’s such a scandal queen,” whenever I asked what
all the giggling and blushing was about.
But that
damned waiter had told me exactly what his plans were. Like an idiot I agreed
to his “bet.” Kindra had given him her number right in front of me, though she tried
to hide it. According to the terms of the wager, I had to “look the other way”
and let this asshole “do what a man can.”
Just
thinking back on it burned me with shame. What was I doing upholding the terms
of such a shady bet, anyway? It probably had something to do with the thumping
of my heart and the sexual thrill I felt alongside the humiliation. Blerg.
Lately
Kindra seemed to be putting off sex with me. Too tired, too stressed. This
happens; it’s not a big deal. But lately I had been awakening in the night to
find Kindra lying with her back to me. One hand on her phone. The other between
her legs.
———————————
I didn’t
think they’d done anything more than text. …sext. There hadn’t’
been time. Probably. She was too busy with work and other obligations. It
wasn’t like her to shirk, either. She was too dedicated. Or was she dedicated to her affairs as well? The uncertainty was eating me. It was torture.
That’s why I think it was both relief and agony when she texted me to meet her
at the restaurant again one night. We didn’t normally eat out so regularly. It
must have been because of him. But perhaps at last I’d get some clue.
I arrived
and she was already there and seated. Unusual; normally she’d wait by the door.
Plus she was wearing a nice dress. Black, velvet, low-cut. Some makeup on
closer inspection. Alarm bells. She rarely dressed up. It was Wednesday. I
racked my mind for an overlooked special occasion, but of course there was
nothing. He was the special occasion. I grasped at the straw
anyway:
“Wow.
What’s the occasion?”
“Hmpf! I
can’t just wear nice things?” she teased. But there was a real edge of
annoyance to it.
“Kindra,
you take my breath away. You are looking even more beautiful than usual.”
I wish
I’d said that. No. It was him. Suddenly there, depositing glasses of water. She
blushed deeply.
“Thank you,
Dax,” she said, placing her hand on his forearm. Then turned her gaze to me, “Nice
to see someone knows how to deliver a compliment.” He left, pulling away from
her hand (which she didn’t remove) and I could swear he flashed me the most
triumphant grin for a half second.
“I said ‘wow’!”
I complained, weakly.
“Yes, you
are truly a Don Juan. What woman’s sense of romance wouldn’t be fulfilled with
such effusive praise?”
“Anyway,
since when are you two on a first name basis?”
“What, you
think Dax told me his name and I just left him hanging? We aren’t all social
inepts, unwilling to make friends.”
“Friends?
He asked for your number.”
She averted
her gaze awkwardly but continued, “well yes…but that doesn’t mean we can’t be
friends in time. If I couldn’t be friends with people who had sexual attraction
towards me I wouldn’t have any male friends at all.”
The
possibilities made my head spin. She had so many male friends. Mostly
male friends. I had never felt like a jealous person, but this was all so much,
so fast. For the first time I had real reason to be jealous.
“You’re
right, of course. I’m just being jealous.” I forced myself to say. “Ignore me.
It’s an unworthy emotion reeking of patriarchy.”
“Yes, it’s
certainly not like you,” she said, still not meeting my eyes. “But despite the
cave-manishness it’s sweet to see you all riled up.”
“Sadist,” I
managed to quip, trying to will joviality into my voice. She looked back up.
“Mmm, you
know it, baby. But also…a girl likes to be reminded that she matters to her
partner. You know? That she has options. Nothing like a little competition to
reignite those affections.”
“I thought
you were looking for friendship?” I said, my heart dropping into my stomach.
She blushed
and looked away again.
“You know
I’m teasing. I just mean that a little jealousy can be affirming. Maybe I like
seeing it in you?”
“I do love
you for your sadism, after all. But I thought that was all in the bedroom.
Guess I should expect a little extra-curricular torture?”
“Hmm,
perhaps.”
My heart
was racing a mile a minute. A cold sweat was dripping from my armpits. I
couldn’t keep up this calm facade.
“Well, I’m
going to the bathroom,” I said, practically race-walking away.
I splashed
cold water on my face and breathed slowly, trying to calm my nerves. It wasn’t
working. I started counting my breaths.
“She
dressed up for me, you know.”
I jumped
and spun around. It was him, of course.
“I was
surprised she agree to do that in front of you, so soon.”
I didn’t know
what to say. I felt a sinking sensation. My ears were burning.
“But I’m
glad she did. Half the fun for me is humiliating the boyfriend. Or husband.
Hell, sometimes even a son. Older women are great, you know? And nothing’s more
shameful for a young man than watching his mother flirt with some young guy;
maybe younger than he is. Too ashamed to stop her from cuckolding his own
father….
“Sorry, I
digress…. How old are you anyway?”
“Uhhh,” I
stalled, dazed.
“Answer me
when I ask you a question.”
“T-t-twenty
five.” What? I wasn’t a stutterer and I owed him nothing. But
I felt so nervous. I found myself looking down, ashamed, like Kindra had been
in front of me.
“Look at me
when I speak to you” he commanded, easily. I met his eyes. There was no anger.
Just confidence. And a boyish grin.
He went on.
“Kindra’s
twenty six. She told me. Good age for a woman. Young enough to have that
perfect, youthful body. Old enough to have maturity; experience, confidence, to
know what she wants. And to start to suspecting what she’s missing…
“I’m still
in high school, actually. I know, I know, I don’t look it. Swear I haven’t just
stayed back a dozen times. I was blessed with a muscular frame and learned some
sexual maturity early. I’m legal, though. Lucky for all these women who get a
real man with a teen boy’s stamina. Right?”
“Umm, uh, I
guess.”
“I suppose
you wouldn’t know. You were never like me. You’re a beta male.
Feminine, subservient. It’s obvious. You cemented your role the moment you
agreed to my wager. What an idiot. No real man would just watch as some guy hit
on his woman. You lost any opportunity you had to be an Alpha
right then. Not that you had much opportunity. But you could have at least
pretended. Maybe grown into it. But look at you, just standing there, silent,
hanging on my every word. This is your awakening.”
I was
boiling with rage inside. I didn’t know if I was more ashamed or pissed off at
his sexist nonsense. Yet I was also entranced.
“Now now, I
don’t mean this in some old school patriarchal way. There’s no right or wrong
in it. But it’s just true. Some folks are more naturally dominant. Others are
subservient, for whatever reason. It’s a thrill. I love humiliating betas like
you. It’s my role… And you love being ashamed and taking your natural place
at my feet. Whether you know it yet or not.”
My ears
must have been purple with hot shame. I wanted to look away but I couldn’t;
didn’t feel right disobeying him. And that just made it worse.
“Kneel.”
I stared at
him, dumb.
“It’s okay,
just take your place. You’ll love it. Now kneel.”
I found
myself kneeling. It just happened. And by now my shame was sharing a lot of
space with arousal.
“Good boy.”
Adrenaline
shot through me at his words. Then he unzipped his pants.
God. I hadn’t sucked a cock in years. I felt thrilled and sick. Did I
want this? Yes! I needed to suck his hard dick until it came inside my
hungry mouth…But also, no! I hated this completely, deep down in my core. I
felt gross, nauseated. And somehow, I felt guilty that I was about to break my
vow of monogamy to Kindra. How silly is that? She started this. Or did I…with
that stupid bet?
“Open your
mouth.”
I opened
wide, obediently, with no hesitation.
He put his
cock in my mouth.
“Close your
lips around it.”
I did. It
wasn’t erect. It felt warm and soft on my tongue and lips.
“Now make
sure to swallow.”
With that a
hot steam let loose in my mouth. It tasted a little acrid. Just a little.
Mostly it just tasted like warm water. Kinda nice, in a perverse way.
But it
didn’t let up. I had to
swallow, repeatedly. Gulp after gulp. On and on. Never opening my mouth or
spilling. It went on forever. How
much had he drunk? I felt like my
stomach was almost out of capacity. That any moment I would try to swallow but
it wouldn’t have anywhere to go and would overflow out of my mouth. All over my
clothes. Marking my shame clearly. God. I felt full. In every way.
“Aaand
that’s good,” he declared, pulling out from my pursed lips with a light pop. He
took hold of his flaccid penis and shook it over me. Warm drops dappled my
face.
“Okay,” he
said, zipping back up, “Now go out there and give your girlfriend a big kiss. A
deep one. Let her taste what a beta male should taste like. Like
whatever an Alpha decides to put in him.”
Full of
shame and confusion, I stood and approached the sink to wash the pee from my
face.
“No. Leave
it.”
I stared
back at him, aghast.
“Now now,
she won’t be able to tell. Not for certain. She’ll just have a vague sense of
what you are.”
I turned
and walked to the door.
“Oh and
don’t forget to keep pretending you don’t know about me and her. I’m gonna make
her my fuck doll right under your nose. And it’ll be more fun for her if she
thinks she’s sneaking around on you. All the thrill of lying and
betrayal.”
I thought I
had lost all of my pride, but something snapped in me and I turned back to him.
“She’ll
never be your ‘fuck doll.’ She, she, she’s an Alpha Female. More than a
match for you.”
He laughed,
heartily. “That’s so cute. You have no idea. Of course to a beta like you she’s
an Alpha. It’s natural for a person with any self respect to step on your neck.
It feels good; right. But like so many girlfriends of betas, she’s just waiting
to be brought to heel by a more dominant partner. To a man like me, she’s just
a bitch in need of training.”
“Fuck you!”
I spat. “You wish.”
“Listen,
Piss Boy!” he growled, wrapping his large hand around my slender neck and
slamming me against the wall. “Don’t take that tone with your betters!” He
glared deep into my eyes for a tense moment before relenting.
“I’ll let
it slide this once since you’re new to this role. But don’t think I’m afraid to
hurt you. A beta like you would cover up any bruises with excuses; too ashamed
to tell his girl the truth.
“Oh, and if
you need some convincing about where this is all headed, take a peek at Kindra’s
texts sometime. She’s already started to reveal her true colors… Bitch is
just waiting to be shown her place.”
He released
his grip. I slumped a little, almost falling. I was defeated. I was sick to my
stomach. Could it be true? I felt hot and cold in all the wrong ways. I
couldn’t stand up to him anymore.
I headed to
the door. Then his hand was on my head.
“Good boy.”
He ruffled my hair. “It’s a hard transition but you’ll get used to this in no
time. Just remember that you’re a beta male.”
With that I
opened the door and finally left. When I got back to the table, Kindra’s face
lit up with a big, loving smile.
“Hey
darling!” God. That made me feel amazing but also like garbage.
Amazing garbage.
I leaned
down and kissed her. Deeply. As we pulled apart her face twisted up in distaste
and confusion. Fuck.
She was
going to interrogate me. Demand to know why I tasted like piss. Call me Piss
Boy, just like he did. I was a Piss Boy. A beta male.
A loser…
But no. She
just shook her head and let the moment pass. Good. What was she
thinking, though? That I tasted like beta male? No no no, that’s was just his twisted
worldview. Nonsense. For a moment he had me believing. But no. It was
retrograde drivel. There wasn’t anything that innately made me need to submit
to him or anyone else. I wasn’t a beta male.
Beta male.
Beta…it
sounded…kinda nice. I’m a beta I said to myself and it sent a tingle down my
spine.
It had all started a few weeks earlier at our
favorite restaurant. I returned from the bathroom to find the new waiter bent
over the booth, talking close to Kindra. I interrupted him by sitting down and
he gave me a cold, calculating glance. Then he aimed a seductive smirk at my
girlfriend before walking away. I raised my eyebrows at Kindra.
“I think he thinks you’re my gay best friend,”
she whispered conspiratorially.
That wasn’t an unusual assumption. As a waifish,
androgynous, and a slightly effeminate guy, people seldom assumed my girlfriend
and I were dating before I said so. Perhaps not even after. It didn’t really
bother me. I had dated boys and sometimes I liked to wear skirts. I had no
shame about such things.
Nothing about the rest of the dinner was
unusual. Maybe the waiter gathered from our affectionate manners that we were a
couple after all.
We went back a few days later. We didn’t get
that waiter, but I saw him bussing tables. He kept glancing over. “Someone has
a crush,” I said to Kindra, teasingly.
“Too bad,” she sighed, “He’s kind of cute.”
“Really, you’d go for a guy like that?” I was
surprised. He was so masculine. Broad shoulders, short hair. Young. Maybe 19 to
my 25.
“If we weren’t dating? I probably would have
given him my number, at least.”
“He asked for your number?!”
“You came back before I had to come up with an
excuse.”
Jealousy burned in my chest. There was no need,
I told myself. Kindra had just expressed that she wasn’t interested in him
since we were dating. Rationality didn’t douse the fiery sensation, though.
I went to the bathroom to wash my hands before
eating. I heard the door open behind me and then a voice was speaking, “Hey,
you’re with Kindra, right?”
I hated talking to people in the bathroom, let
alone this jerk.
“Yeah.”
“I figured. I can’t understand it, but I
figured. Are you two monogamous?”
“Afraid so.”
“You sure?”
“Pretty sure.”
“So there’s doubt?”
“…not really.”
“Tell you what, I’ll do you a favor. Let’s make
a bet.”
“Not interested.”
“I’ll try to hit on her.”
“Not much of a bet.”
“You give me thirty seconds. If I can get her to
laugh, you give me an additional minute. If I can get her to let me put my hand
on her shoulder – without pushing it off – you give me two minutes longer. If I
can get her number, well… I’m in. You can’t try to stop me. You have to look
the other way. Let me do what a man can.”
“…still not much of a bet. What’s in it for
me?”
“Now that’s obvious. If she doesn’t give me her
number, you get the satisfaction of knowing she’s true. A rare certainty. My
gift to you.”
Nothing about this seemed like a good idea. It
was rude to Kindra and put me at risk with no real benefit. Yet something about
the jealousy burning in my chest pushed me on. That and a feeling of
schoolyard, boyish pride I would have assumed long dead. I needed to
prove this asshole wrong.
At some point in the conversation, he had
started using the urinal. So when I turned, I unexpectedly saw him on display.
He was standing back from the urinal, farther than usual, as if daring me to
look at his manhood. My eyes darted down of their own accord. His penis was
thick and large, though flaccid, and his stream was strong. An involuntary
shudder of desire ran through me.
“You’re on,” I said, extending my hand.
He finished up and took my hand in his unwashed
one. His grip was firm – but not in that childishly painful vice-grip way I
would have expected. Just a confident, manly handshake. It was strangely
humiliating and thrilling.
“Give me a head start. You can watch from behind
the potted plant without being seen. I wish you luck; you’ll need it.” He left,
without washing.
The was indeed a plant around the corner from
the bathrooms. I acted the voyeur, feeling foolish. He approached our table.
Kindra smiled brightly at him and they began chatting. This didn’t look good.
Then I realized I wasn’t timing them and scrambled to pull out my phone and
activate the stopwatch app.
Ten seconds later she was still maintaining eye
contact. Another fifteen seconds and she was smiling wider. I was about to walk
out and break it up, but just as I took my first step she was laughing. Not
just her polite laugh, either. It was genuine and full.
Fine. I looked down at my phone, noting the
time. What he was saying I couldn’t hear, but she kept laughing. The flames in
my chest were consuming me. Fifty seconds later he nonchalantly slipped his
hand down from the back of the booth to Kindra’s shoulder. It was smooth, I had
to admit. She tensed. Her eyes darted around. Looking for me, probably. But I
was apparently well hidden behind a screen of green leaves. Kindra’s shoulders
relaxed. She left his hand there.
My heart fluttered and I felt a stirring, lower
down. What the hell? I glanced at the stopwatch, nervously.
They kept chatting, smiling, giggling. His hand
squeezed her shoulder. She seemed to like it. Blerg. At the minute and a half
mark he pulled out a pen and leaned in toward her, inquiringly. Fuck!
What the hell had I been thinking?! This was crazy.
She took the pen and grabbed his free hand. The
first intimate gesture she had initiated… Kindra put the pen tip to his palm.
But then doubt crept across her face and she pushed his hand away. Giving the
pen back, she frowned and seemed to be apologizing.
Yes!
Confirming that the time had elapsed, I walked
over and sat down in the booth. I gave this busboy/waiter a smug smile. He
returned it, seemingly unperturbed, and walked off.
“He bothering you?” I asked Kindra, innocently
as I could.
“Nah. He’s sweet, actually. Kinda funny.”
“…if you say so.”
“Oh don’t be like that. Just because someone’s
not an obvious member of the queer, hipster elite you think they’re a Nazi.”
“Do not.”
“You totally do.”
“Fine, I’m sure the busboy is a gentle bunny.”
“Dax.”
“Hmm?”
“His name’s Dax.”
“Okay.”
The rest of the meal went without a hitch. I
felt weird, but Kindra seemed as bright and bubbly as ever. Maybe moreso. I
could see Dax lurking around; I tried to block him out.
Dax must have switched with our waiter because
he brought the bill. I usually paid since Kindra didn’t make very much. But
this time she grabbed up the paper with surprising speed. As she did so, I
could swear I saw a handwritten note at the bottom. She put her arm on the
table to write, blocking my view. I watched Kindra’s face instead. She bit her
lip and frowned before jotting down something extra. Then she quickly held her
credit card and the receipt paper aloft. That bastard came by immediately and
grabbed it. He gazed at the bill, smirked, and looked directly at me before
heading to the cash register. Did he just?
I glanced over, catching Dax on
his phone, typing away. Just then Kindra got a text. Reading the message, she
blushed.
That asshole! He’d
done it.
Kindra texted a little more. I confirmed
with my peripheral vision that there was correlation. Not much room for doubt.
He’d gotten her number. He’d won. I felt humiliation. But
also…arousal?
He came back with her card
and processed receipt. She tried to hide with her arm again, but I still saw
her fill in a substantial tip and draw a quick doodle of a winking kissy face
before turning the paper over. Really?! Right under my nose?
“You ready?” Kindra asked me, standing. My legs
were wobbly and nearly didn’t support me. But I managed. As we left, he waved
and said goodbye in the friendliest, most professional way possible. Yet Kindra
blushed even deeper in response. As I walked by, trailing behind my girlfriend,
he leaned in and whispered to me, “Remember, you have to look the other way. Loser.”
100 followers left to the big 1k, expect big things!
Your heart sinks. What an anniversary gift. One year since your first date at this very restaurant. She had angrily demanded monogamy when you had suggested an open relationship shortly after that date. You apologized profusely. It had been your best friend’s crazy idea. Former best friend. He said any girl would totally leave you if you tried to be monogamous. You’d never dated anyone; didn’t know any better. It must have been his prank but it was too far. You promised her you’d never to bring it up again and broke off contact with the friend.
Turns out she got this “friend’s” number from your phone and texted him a piece of her mind.
She berated him fiercely.
He replied: “Lol, you’d be a saint to stay monogamous with that limp dicked fool. I love the cuck but you’ll see I wasn’t lying”. Soon after you two started having sex…she texted him again. “Fuck, I think you were right. He’s the sweetest guy I know but I need more… God, why are you my only confidante now? I’m still way too jealous for an open relationship, though…” His reply was swift, “Duh, just cheat on him. And, yes, you can come to my place for a proper fuck any time. What are friends for?”
She tells you, “So I really think we owe your friend an apology. I mean, you do. You can see how I apologized. Multiple times. But I mean, he gave you solid advice. Any girl would leave you if she didn’t have someone else to satisfy her urges. And look at how ungratefully you have shunned him since then. I really think your apology should be to give him your ticket for our romantic weekend get-away. That seems fair, don’t you think?”
ProblemCollectionLove 